Weird People on Facebook - have any crazy stories like this?

Just don't push me. Don't.

This is a weird social web vignette from my life. I had an odd thing happen to me yesterday. There is that op-ed to do re the Goldman Sachs 12 vet who resigned via the NY Times. I read it, and it all seems to swirl around Greg Smith finally realizing that the GS culture wasn't what he thought it was. He calls them out and walks away. Okay, I can appreciate that for what it is, that's a significant decision for him and, yeah, I don't think he'll be welcome in any Wall Street firm again...ever.

But I'm cynical about it. It's not like he's publicly given away the fortune he's made or made any announcement about it going in trust to benefit a charity or create a foundation.  He's not announced that he's moving into fundraising or other nonprofit work. It won't be a first-class, hotel suites and bottle-service lifestyle for him anymore, but at 33, he can probably live the rest of his life at a level of comfort that most only dream of. For me, it's just a current event that isn't that significant, and I surely don't see it causing an awakening of conscious on Wall Street, in the financial sector at large or Washington, D.C. anytime soon.

Well, this one woman I barely know disagreed with me and by barely, I mean barely. I met her during the scholarship application review process for my alma mater last year.  One morning we evaluated applications and the next weekend we interviewed candidates.  That's it.  That's all.  No lunch before or after.  No getting together over a cup of coffee.  Nothing.  At best, she is an acquaintance.  Since I have nice but essentially superficial bonds online with other fellow alums I've met doing this, I figured this one would be the same.  We'd exchange comments here and there but all would be fine. 

I guess she worked on Wall Street for a couple of years, so she felt entitled to keep coming at me yesterday on Facebook after I posted a couple of articles that reacted to this banker's op-ed resignation.

In her reply to the first article from The Daily Beast, I could tell she disagreed. Okay, but it's my page and my opinion. Move along if you don't agree or have your say and then move along.  Either way, have you say but keep it civil. I found another article that complied parodies of his resignation. I guess, for her, it was on. For me, it was like, "huh?"

About four replies in, I said something like "lets just agree to disagree".  Most people then just leave it, but nope. She kept coming at me and a few replies later she does the "how would you solve this problem?" move. My reply was essentially to call her out for the false choice tactic.  You can't win, so instead you ask the person you're disagreeing with to find a solution for world peace or something else crazy. That's also called a bait and switch. Give me a break, we disagree and now you're trying to corner me with a question so complex that I'm doomed to fail? I disagree with you so now I have the burden of solving the moral crisis on Wall Street? GTFOHWTBS. I also said she was being "insanely aggressive" and ended my reply by saying this was the end of the conversation.

Like seriously. I had my reasons beyond it simply being a useless debate. While this was going on, even though it was late in the evening, I was working. The discussion was not only going nowhere, it was also distracting. Her keeping it going was just irritating.  Any new replies from her after that I just deleted and added again: "END OF DISCUSSION".

"END OF DISCUSSION" in bold I think, is pretty clear. She then tried to flip it by implying that me cutting her off was insanely aggressive. Nope. It was done and I was sick of her coming back with the same opinion over and over. I didn't take that bait either. Again, I just deleted any further attempts to keep the discussion going.  She then moved it to my wall by asking me would my opinion change if I knew the guy personally? The answer? No.  I'd probably ask him to come with me on a trip to NOLA or something because, clearly, he's got both the time and the money, but nope.  However, again, I side-stepped the debate and just deleted the question.

I then finished my work and went to sleep.  I did consider doing the unfriending move, but I figured she'd come to her senses or sober up, and would realize fighting with a virtual stranger over Facebook maybe isn't the most productive use of anyone's time.  I woke to see that she'd not sobered up and instead had done me a favor and unfriended me.  Thank God for small favors!

It was just...weird. It was like she was on this mission to just make me stay engaged in this debate until I changed my mind. For me, it's a minor issue. It's a bit of news that's interesting. It's cocktail chatter. I'll bring it up over the weekend when I'm out with people and that's about it. For her, clearly, it is more. I was just odd having someone I barely know nipping at me.

Me calling her out as "insanely aggressive" seemed to put her over. But who does that? I see things that people post on their walls that I don't agree with.  If I feel strongly enough, I'll say something and usually that's it.   I also realize that my opinion isn't the only valid opinion out there, but, most important, debates on Facebook are just a waste of time. 

Say what you have to say and then keep it moving. This isn't debate club and it certainly isn't moot court. I guess it just shocked her that I was like "okay, enough" and I was serious because I deleted anything else she had to say. I'd had enough. Have a child if you want to harangue someone, but leave me out of it.

It struck me as a weird intersection of female entitlement with and certainly a fair level of disrespect and condescension on her part, and just not knowing when to shut up or, at least, let the other person walk away.

Another odd story from the very weird social web.

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It's on...

My view of the Empire State Building last night from the spot where I board the bus to Philadelphia.

Good morning from the east coast. I've been here for just under one week. Man, I'm already tired. It's not in a bad "I wanna go home way," but in a really good way.

There are some things that are pretty similar to what I left behind in South Korea. The most obvious thing is the ease of transport. In California, the idea of taking buses or trains to connect to nearby cities is pretty much unheard of. You have to get in your car and blow pollutants into the air and, if you don't have a car, well, you're out of luck.

It's not impossible. You can do it. I've heard the stories of friends who decided to take the Greyhound bus from San Francisco to L.A. or vice versa. It ends up that you're on the bus with ex-cons, drug addicts and goodness knows who else. So while you CAN do it, your average person doesn't WANT to do it. In contrast, in the US northeast you can be on the bus from Philadelphia to Manhattan with a drug addict, but that drug addict had to pay at least $10 to get on the bus and is probably heading into university or to work.

The prices for the trains are much steeper in the States. The train ride on Amtrak from Philadelphia to New York ranges from $45 to, get this, $143! Now the rates shift based on the class you choose and the time, but a similar hour and 45 minute train ride on Korea's KTX, their high-speed trains, are comparable at the basic level. It's around 44,000 won, so that's about the same. However, the first class rate maxes out at around 65,000 won. The prices compare for the bus system, but the coverage doesn't. In Korea, the intercity bus system is exhaustive. And this is just a link to one bus system. There is another. You can get on an express bus to get you anywhere in South Korea from Seoul. A two hour bus ride from Seoul is about the same in terms of price, so that's good. But the sheer coverage of where you can get to is truly overwhelming until you're used to it.

This transition is going to be interesting, at least to me, and I'm going to want to share it. From that perspective, this is officially now an east coast/NYC blog with a Korea blog past ;) There are so many little interesting and different things I'm seeing.

Just watching the famous demeanor of New Yorkers is entertaining. I was in the Lexington and 53rd St station. I know this because it's the same station I went to for my job interview last week. I was going back to exchange the umbrella I bought during last Thursday's deluge. One lady needed a refund or a replacement Metro card. She went to a booth where they weren't equipped to do that. Based on her reaction, you would have thought they'd called her every name in the book. I thought it was a bit odd to loose your cool over something like that.

I factor in the pain in the butt aspects of transactions these days and expect that I'm going to get a bit of a run around. That's simply because it's too expensive to keep staff standing in multiple spots to give you a refund. It was the late afternoon and the trains were definitely going to be running for many hours more. Her choice to verbally abuse the folks there just seemed excessive. Plus, unless provoked, I really am a firm believer of being nice and saying "please" and "thank you." I'm noticing what a huge anomaly that is in Manhattan. Now don't get me wrong. I've also not been in a city where the men have been hold open for me almost constantly. So some New Yorkers might be snappish but they'll help you get through the door.

I think yesterday was a bit of a challenge for me because I'd booked myself on a real early bus leaving out of Philadelphia, so I got moving around 4:30am to catch the train to 30th Street Station. From there, I realized I needed to print up my resume. I wasted both time and money taking care of that. BTW, if they offer the laptop docking station at Kinkos aka FedEx Office -don't do it. Just give them your USB flash drive. They actually charge you to doc your laptop and print. That's just such a greedy level of stupid to me that I won't do it.

After printing, I was off. I got my resume in to one recruiting agency, chit-chatted a bit, got their recommendations for lunch and headed out. I got to the lobby and *snap* the heel on my right ankle boot just collapsed. These are a great pair of boots that I got when I was in Paris. I can probably get them fixed, but that lead to a complete detour.

Good for me that I was right at Union Square and had passed a big shoe store on the way to this agency. They were having a sale: buy one get the other at half-price. Okay, I can work with that. I found a great pair of Steve Madden flats and a nice pair of black patent leather square-toed pumps with a strap. Both shoes are cute but reserved enough for interviews. Plus, I only had one pair of brown shoes suitable for interviews and needed another pair. So the boot collapse made me do something I was going to have to do anyway. It's just I'd not planned it and it ended up sucking a good 45 to 60 minutes of my day away. I could have bought shoes out here in Philly's lovely western suburbs! Believe me, the King of Prussia mall is no joke. But there are also tons of other stores like Ross nearby too.

I didn't get out of the shoe store until lunch. Inside, there was another cranky New Yorker who just couldn't wait until the cashier was done with me and went on and on about needed quarters for the meter. Good for me that I had four quarters in my wallet. Helping her out was the way to get her to hush and say "thank you". Granted, it was to me, but I just wanted her to bring down the anxiety level. Four quarters isn't worth getting everyone around you all riled up. Really, you know the deal, so grab a roll of quarters at the bank and keep them in your change purse. After that, armed with a cute pair of shoes, I got to prance through the farmer's market at Union Square and have a great lunch. However, after that, my spirits just plummeted.

I think it's because I'm starting my job search in earnest now and, as much as I love Manhattan, even for me, it's an assault to the senses, which is exciting but it's also overwhelming when you're feeling anxious. Let's be honest, searching for work under the best of circumstances is stressful. I was okay after lunch for a bit. I got to a Starbucks to leech their wifi and figure out which recruiting office I was closest to. It ends up one was just a five or so minute walk away, so that was the one. The receptionist was just not nice and that threw me into a funk. I think actually having a plan, with resumes in hand and winding my way around brought it home that I'm really doing this. Dealing with a shrew reminded me that it's really on me to hustle and do my best because the random person just might not give two cents about me. I've had it in my head since I was about 15 or 16 that I wanted to move to NYC, so the reality that I'm actually doing it made me made me a bit overwhelmed.

Good for me that there are Episcopalian churches all over the city. When I was in Seoul, I attended Seoul Anglican Cathedral regularly. When I got to San Francisco, I switched to Grace Cathedral. Yesterday, I needed to decompress and saw a church with the Episcopalian flag and was just so relieved. I went into Saint Thomas Church on 5th Avenue. It was relaxing, for a moment, but the tourists with the flashing cameras drove me away. I then decided to walk to the 5:30pm networking party I had scheduled rather than take the subway and found Saint Bartholomew's Church on Park and 53rd. I went in, grabbed a prayer book, relaxed and just collected my thoughts. I came out in a much better mood.

So just imagine me, your relocating blogger rushing into NYC's Episcopal churches to recharge. I seriously needed it yesterday. I got to my networking event in good spirits and ready to go. I was a bit amused by how serious folks were. I think one distinguishing thing about me is I really do want to smile and enjoy every possible moment, so I get put off by the folks so driven that they forget to enjoy the ride. I met some good folks, and I hope they feel the same. Maybe one or more of those connections can turn into work for me or vice versa.

Anyway, it's views like the one I snapped a pic of last night that remind me that I'm on the right track. Now that things are getting interesting, I've got a feeling I'll be updating a lot more. Stay tuned.

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Crap That I Won't Miss: Weird Foreigners

"Forgive your enemies, but never forget their names." - John F. Kennedy
___________________

Now I won't publish this guy's email or family name, but I will publish this ridiculous email exchange.

Let me give you a bit of background.

Unbeknownst to me, I ended up getting a job at the same school with the guy who inspired this post: Ugly Americans, Young White Men, Korea and Me. I've been there for almost two years at this point. I've not revealed that I'm working with him simply because I never felt the need to do it. However, I was going to after the fact just to update the story. Now due to this silliness, it's happened even sooner.

If you read that post, you realize there is no love lost. None! I basically did my job and just didn't bother.

For the sake of clarity, I will refer to him as "Mad Nutter" and to myself as "Moi" later in this post.

Anyway, my job chose the change the terms of our contracts. I was already seriously considering not renewing simply because the atmosphere had changed, and I was getting tired of the commute. I work in Suwon but I live in Seoul. It's not bad, but it was getting to be tedious for me.

They gave us a deadline to request a renewal. This is standard procedure with them. We request the renewal. They then take it to a committee and we're informed whether they'll extend our contract or not. A little much on the procedure but okay. I didn't bother requesting a renewal. I was done after they informed us of the changes. Then the school did what a lot of colleges and universities do. They dismissed the instructors that had been with them for three years.

Now the rumor I heard was that after three years colleges and universities have to offer you tenure. I don't know if that's true or not. I've never researched it, but I figured that might get thrown out as a reason. It ends up they didn't explain what the reason was, and I don't think any of the dismissed instructors asked. For me it's neither here nor there, as I'm leaving but I do feel bad it was handled this way. After the offers or lack of offers were sent out, I got an inquiry from another co-worker asking if I'd been renewed. I'd explained I'd not asked for a renewal and that was that or so I thought.

Well, no, because tonight I got an email from Mad Nutter saying he wanted the teachers to ban together and take the school to court. I replied saying, since I'd chosen to not to renew that I don't have standing but good luck.

He writes back to say that someone has informed him that people who've been at a job in Korea for longer than two years have special rights. I point out that he's been there for more than two years but I've not. So again, I don't have standing and again, thanks and good luck.

He writes back again to say that if they win, I'd get an offer. I explain I DON'T WANT an offer and my reasons for that. Again, thanks and take care.

He comes back now talking about I'm inhuman because I don't want to know about my coworkers.

WTF? Really...wtf?

You'd think he would have gotten the hint after the first email, but NO! He starts a new email topic asking me am I always like this...um, yeah, asshole, I am.

This goes back and forth. I'm just pissed that this is actually going on. I explain that I thought I'd been pretty upfront. I'd said why I wasn't interested, only to be told I was "bragging". I went out of my way to wish him luck and say "thanks" only to be pestered and insulted.

What a fucking mental case. And, yes, you could accuse me of indulging it. But, I really did figure he'd just eventually move on. He had in the past.

Anyway, I eventually said, leave me alone or I'm taking this to the net. In the course of the emails, I'd asked him a question. He then chose to harp on this question as if it was some incredible error. Basically, it was the bait and switch technique people pull in an argument when they know their original point they've brought up basically is wrong. And his original point was I was inhuman, but no, it's not that I don't care about my co-workers. I don't care about going back and forth with your insane ass.

Guess what? Yeah, he didn't leave me alone. Had he, I wouldn't need to be up writing this crap out. You don't have to read it. I mean, I've described it pretty well...I think. However, here it is: five email threads between Mad Nutter and Moi.

I've eliminated his last name and email. He's also threatened that he's going to publish it too. Oh no! What will I do?!!!

The first email - "job end":

Mad Nutter:

Hi,

Please send me an email if you are interested in defending against our termination. I have an expert, who says a new labor law in 2008 states that employees have special consideration (and rights) if they have worked at a job for longer than 2 years. Although we haven't rallied together in the past, a collaborative effort could/would see our jobs reinstated, which is deserving. Also, once being reinstated, long term employment is certain. This expert would like to meet with us, for FREE ADVICE and CONSULTATION. If it my deep understand that the decision to terminate us rests on the misbelief that we won't do our homework/reseach about our rights, moreso than having a solid legal right for doing so.

Working together on this matter would make each of our INVOLVEMENT/CONTRIBUTIONS in this matter, minimal.

I appreciate your response and input,


elliot

Moi:

I didn't request a renewal, so I didn't get terminated. I chose to leave.

Good luck

Mad Nutter:

just wanted to keep you updated, cheers,

Moi (and this is where, I admit, I ought to have just not replied):

Thanks but no need since I have no standing in this situation. Best of luck to you.

Take care.

R

Mad Nutter:

well, if we get reinstated.. you'd have an offer back on the table. And the court case gets settled, in court, in about 3 hours because it is a non-controversial case and the college doesn't really have any ground to stand on. Have it rapped up by February 1st.

Moi:

I was already considering leaving. Again, you presume too much about people you don't know well.

My choice is more about me and not over this school. Their actions only made my choice much easier. Ironically, I'm actually thankful for them confirming my feeling the school's environment had changed for the worse. I'm not happy with the changes in staff because that's negatively impacted the work environment. I've already turned down other job offers. Even in this scary economy, being unemployed isn't the issue for me right now. The issue is being exceptionally picky about my working conditions if I choose to stay a bit longer.

There is nothing illegal about a jerk being your management chain of command. Maybe their actions are illegal when it comes to workers' rights. That's yet to be determined. Plus, technically, this would only apply to the people who've been under contract for two years. I have not been employed by them for that long.

I do think if they can be held to account that would be good for the sake of current and future employees. However, beyond that, I have no interest in working for them any longer.

Again, I have no need or desire for updates.

Thanks.

RW

Clearly, he's pissed I said he was presumptuous, but yeah, that's no surprise.

Email two - "presume":

Mad Nutter:

Are you always like this?

Moi:

dude, I'm telling you I'm not interested in pursuing legal action AND that there is no need to contact me on it any further.

Yes, I'm always HONEST.

Mad Nutter:

there's been a few fibs. So you can't claim totally honesty.

Moi:

Okay, I'm going to ask YOU now are you always like this?

I haven't fibbed about jack. You just can't seem understand "thanks, but no thanks", so I went out of my way to explain WHY I'm simply not interested in this.

What the hell? I was nice. I said that I wasn't interested and that I didn't need any further updates and went out of my way to acknowledge that there very well could be a cause of action and thanked you for keeping me posted. (That's more than I can say you did for me when I let you know about there being no substantial rule change for the process to get permission to work at a camp.) You keeptcoming back with more reasons and I keep saying, I'm not interested.

1. I don't want to work for (school's name removed) anymore - including the management and, honestly, the commute.
2. I didn't ask to work for them anymore.
3. I have turned down recent job offers.

So fibs? Please, why would I bother fibbing to you?

Mad Nutter:

Well, it's just more human to want to know if 6 of my coworkers got sacked, I'd wanted to hear about what's going on, how they are doing, etc. Kept in the loop. That's why.

Why would you fib? You have something to prove to people. But that's not what people care about, or what makes people interesting. In literature, it is explained this way. In a world so impersonal, so inauthentic and cold - it's the human characteristics, in others, that people really care about.

You just said you are always honest, and that's kind of impossible so it has to, in itself, be another fib.

Moi:

I don't talk to any of you on a regular basis. I'll hear about it through the people I have relationships with.

I don't have a thing to prove to you, sorry. You over estimate your importance. You're pestering me. I'm telling you to leave me alone. It's simple.

I'm honest. I want you to leave me alone.

Email three - "question":

Mad Nutter:

how can you ask me a couple of questions and then tell me I'm pestering you when I respond??

Moi:

Duh.

Quid pro quo. I didn't ask you anything until that last email, so don't twist it. I'm no novice.

You've continued to pester me for I don't know how many emails simply because I'm not interested in whatever you're going to try to do. I've been clear about my reasons for not wanting further contact but courteous in wishing you luck.

If I've got to deal with this stupidity, I can fire the question right back at you.

So again, are you always like this?

Email four - "irony":

Mad Nutter:

No,

The irony is that in the same email you told me to stop pestering you and then you followed it up with a question.

And you did again in your last email, "continue to pestering me, but since this is so stupid, are you always like this??"

twice,

nice,

ell

Moi:

Elliot,

Pestering and answering my question are two different things.

It's really ridiculous that you try to be so smug but have such trouble understanding that basic concept.

Answering a question I've asked you isn't pestering me. Attacking me with your ridiculous theories about my character is.

You asked me a question and I answered it. You then decided to keep it going by saying no, I was a liar because I'm out to impress you. But the point is if you weren't so insecure you wouldn't see me as having denied a job offer as bragging. I explained why I was going to quit and why I don't want to work there. You're so isolated that you assume I need contact with you to stay updated on what's going on with some of the people I've worked with. No I don't need you for updates, thanks.

So I'm going to lay this down.

1) answer the question or 2) leave me alone.

If you chose not to do either of these, you'll have to talk to your attorney about suing me too because I'm about to publish this entire email exchange with no names or emails on the Internet. However, if you push me, your name will be on it too.

This IS a threat. I've been dealing with this ridiculous series of emails for a hours at this point and, believe it or not, I've got work to do.

It's interesting that you're real quick to try to verbally attack me in emails where no one else can see it. However, I'm sick of it. I told you I wasn't interested in what you were doing. I told you why. I wished you luck and thanked you for including me. You accused me of lying and essentially being inhuman because I don't want to discuss this silliness with you.

Sorry man, but that's ridiculous and you know it. Now you're harping on the fact that I've asked you a question but I've also asked you to stop pestering me. Now that I've explained the difference, maybe you get it. If you don't maybe email Noam Chomsky and he can explain it to you.

But ooops, I realized that in my haste to hit send, I'd fucked up and wrote "either" when I meant to write "neither".

So, since one big issue has been him simply refusing to admit he's made an error, this is actually perfect. I get to eat crow and point out that he's loathe to ever do so.

Of course, going through it bit by bit, I realize I was right the first time. Oh well, I proved my point that 1) I make errors and 2) when I do, I'll say so ;)

Moi:

I hate typos, but this is important to clarify.

If you chose not to do either of these, you'll have to talk to your attorney about suing me too because I'm about to publish this entire email exchange with no names or emails on the Internet. However, if you push me, your name will be on it too.

Sorry this should read:

If you chose not to do neither of these, you'll have to talk to your attorney about suing me too because I'm about to publish this entire email exchange with no names or emails on the Internet. However, if you push me, your name will be on it too.

And that is me acknowledging when I've made an error. Funny you can't do the same.

RW

Mad Nutter:

well, if you tell me to leave you alone and then ask me to answer a question.. and blackmail me into following one of your two scenarios. It's all a little strange.

elliot

Moi:

Published...now that's not strange.

G'night.

Mad Nutter:

how is that not strange, just because you followed through on blackmail??

lost,

e

I'm on the phone at this point talking to a friend, describing this situation and laughing my ass off. I don't answer. When I finally read it, he's said this.

Mad Nutter:

look for the ENTIRE email correspondence to be posted with your name,

cheers
e

Damn folks, it looks like he's now threatened me! Oh no!!!

Moi:

Will do...funny what you don't know, again.

And, so far, last email thread five - "challenge" (ha! hard to do since I think I made the threat):

Mad Nutter:

I challenge you to publish the ENTIRE correspondence. I can leave you the dust in any debate, so we'll move on to getting you to publishing the ENTIRE correspondence.

Moi:

Elliot,

I'm writing it up right now. I'll be sure to send you the link.

Now, go away.

R

Mad Nutter:

look forward to seeing your name on it,

as a published piece online,

elliot

Clearly, he doesn't know I'm already published online with my name...ooops.

Moi:

Dude, you're an idiot. I have a blog that I've written for awhile about living here in Korea.

I've published it there with only your first name and the dialogue name of "Mad Nutter". Of course, that blog has my blogger handle, but also my real name in certain pieces as I write for one of the papers here. However, I'll make sure to sign my name at the end so it's there. Bluff called...

It's up. Have at it.

Click here: Crap That I Won't Miss: Weird Foreigners

Now, please go away.

R

Now, I hit "publish" and, as you see above, I informed Mad Nutter that it was done.

The message below was in my inbox this morning, as since this is about publishing the complete thread, here it is.

Delusional.

Mad Nutter:

i don't give in to blackmail.. "choose option 1 or 2 or else". My guess is you'll leave that out.

Someone "guessed" wrong ;)

Signed in frustration,

Regina Walton

P.S. What is hilarious to me is he "challenged" me to do exactly what I said I was going to do...hello? I told you I was going to publish this mess, stupid.

How original.

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This is why...

This is why I'm a misanthrope.

I'm a little pissy right now. I'll tell you why. I went out last night with a group of people. Now, for the most part, it was fun. But, seriously, sometimes people just don't know how to act.

I'll admit I'm sensitive. It might not come off in the way I present myself. I'm confident for sure. I know my stuff but I'm also interested in hearing what others have to say on things. I mean how else do you learn if you don't take the time to listen to other people? I also know, however, that my facial expressions reveal volumes. The one thing I don't have is a poker face. It's the drama and performance art school wiring that still hasn't worn off.

Anyway, I'm out and an acquaintance of mine was frequently lamenting about how she needed to find work. I've been here awhile, she's a smart and funny person, so I went out of my way to ask my Korean friends to let me know about any job openings they'd hear of. I forwarded whatever I got and lo and behold through one of my contacts she got an interview. Cool, right?

Turns out this was around the same time I'd gotten back to Seoul after my great vacation home. I was, and still am, heartsick 'cause it seems there's a great guy back home who really likes me. I was homesick for a myriad of other reasons and wondering if coming back for one more year was really worth it. But, most importantly, I was jet-lagged like a mug. Both mentally and physically, this was one of the hardest readjustments I'd ever had since I moved here and, no, this stuff didn't work at all.*


As a result, I started turning off my phone because I was waking up at 1 or 2am Korea time which is 9 or 10am in California time. Basically, just as I was wondering if I'd made the right choice, my body was refusing to switch back to GMT +9 time without a fight.

Well, as I said, she got the interview, hooray! However, she'd not told me about it nor did I have any clue about what was going on until the day she's got to show up. This is the story. I finally wake up. I turn on my phone and there is this frantic text message from her asking me how to get to her interview. I text her back saying I was jet lagged and turned my phone off, but that I hope she made it there and to keep me posted. Well, she didn't keep me posted. In fact, I got radio silence from her. I sensed she was irritated with me.

I finally saw her last evening and she said that she was irritated with me for having my phone off. Excuse me? Last I checked, if it weren't for me you wouldn't have heard about the job. Second, I'm careful over careful regarding job interviews to the point that I will go in advance to scope out the location just to make sure I know where it is. Third, I'd never have the nerve to pull attitude on someone who'd given me a connection to get work. My style is a bit more gracious. I thank people who use their resources to help me.

Later on we're leaving and a group of us are piled into one car. The topic is a friend we have in common. People were going on about how she was "droppin' it like it's hot" on the dance floor and I thought that was a great story.

I also know she's got a great attitude and she's fun to spend time with, so I mention that her mother is in town and she's contacted people to have dinner with them sometime this weekend. I said something like "I can't wait to meet her mother, that's going to be fun." Someone in the car whom I'd not spoken to much during the evening asked me "what do you mean by that?" with this accusatory tone. That caught me off guard because I didn't mean anything bad. I meant what I fuckin' said, asshole. I then decided for the sake of not loosing my temper 'cause I didn't know her and that wasn't the place or time for a confrontation that I meant the woman is funny and interesting and, because of that, I can't wait to meet her mother.

Weird ass fucking people - even drunk I think I'm pretty nice. That's said to anticipate the "maybe they were drunk" defense which is never an excuse in my book. If you can't handle your liquor then don't drink because you being an ass ruins the time for all the drunks with good dispositions. Too bad some people don't think that being nice doesn't applies to them.

I can see why sometimes I'm just content with doing my own damn thing. The social life in Korea can be a Waste Land and I'm starting to loathe the foreign population again in particular. People are irritating.

Other than being rich, I think I might have more in common with the fictional Due des Esseintes than I want to admit.

Huysmans recounts that the Duc des Esseintes lived alone in a vast villa on the outskirts of Paris. He rarely went anywhere to avoid what he took to be the ugliness and stupidity of others. One afternoon in his youth, he had ventured into a nearby village for a few hours and had felt his detestation of people grow fierce. Since then he had chosen to spend his days alone in bed in his study, reading the classics of literature and moulding acerbic thoughts about humanity.

from the Art of Travel by Alain de Botton

...grumble...

Okay, :::rant mode off:::

Time for me to get started with my day.

Oh and, yes, I told the first person how I feel, so no this isn't the punk's way of calling someone out. I don't know the second person well enough to care to discuss it. I'm just sharing the story 'cause it's on my mind and triggers some sort of feeling. Feeling is pretty much what inspires all of my blogs.

And here is the music selection for the day from the same album with "Drop It Like It's Hot" but I like this song better.

Signs - Snoop Dogg and Justin Timberlake:

____________________________

*In all fairness, it did seem to work from Seoul to the L.A. But I forget which way is supposed to be the easier adjustment. Either traveling from east to west or vice versa across the Pacific is supposed to be easier. I hit the ground running when I got to L.A., so maybe it's east to west. West to east was just BRUTAL.

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Drunk Dialing Call Block

Okay, that's it! There are some negatives to being an expatriate. One big one are your fellow expatriates who are often maladjusted in some way. When the weird strikes an expatriate situation it's usually very weird. BTW, I'm not saying I'm free of maladjustments; I know I have my own special selection too. I just think they're minor, but who doesn't?

Anyway, there is someone who is prone to sending me text messages at REALLY inappropriate times. I've tolerated it simply because the messages were so ridiculous they were funny. The subject matter is always some starlet or other - okay, whatever, some lonely dude who is in dire need of friends fixating on some woman on TV or on the Internet. However, the joke grew stale months ago because it's the same damn joke. Unfortunately, he's grown to know my schedule and knows I usually rise early. One morning I he woke me up with this madness and I was livid because I'd had a late night out.

Well, I was snoozing away in my warm bed this morning, and that's very important when the temperature is -3°C, that's 26°F, when I heard my cell phone vibrating. I was thinking "no, way...not again!" Sure enough, there was a message which was time stamped at 4:15am!

Furious, I replied back. That's probably the worst thing I could have done with someone who has lacks to good sense to realize doing this causes people to AVOID you. When it happened a couple of weeks ago and I said he'd woken me up, there was no "I'm sorry", there were only more messages!

So when I awoke this morning to the same ol' shit, I was very much finished with it all.

Done.

Joke delivered. It sucks...still.

NUMBER BLOCKED...GONG!



However, the result is I'm pissed off and awake, and I surf the Internet when I'm up in the wee hours. I found this blog about an LG brand phone that prevents drunk dialing. I only have drunk texting, but it's just as annoying. The offending party has one of those MBA-supported finance jobs, so he can afford a new phone. I think I'll pass this on to someone who can get this to him as I officially have him on ignore now. Okay, I'm going back to sleep.

LG Offers a Phone That Can Tell if You Are Drunk!

Adding new meaning to the term “smart phone”, Korea-based Lucky Goldstar has released a phone in the US this summer with a built-in breathalyzer. 200,000 of the LP4100 model phones had already been sold in Korea before hitting the US market.

When you blow into this phone and it detects you are over the legal limit, it gives a warning and displays a cute little animation of a car swerving off the road and smashing into traffic cones. A wise driver would then stop and hand the wheel over to a friend, or call a taxi. Targeted to hard partying younger people, the phone also has a “Drunk Dialing” call block. You can set certain numbers as blocked at certain times of the night, or if you are too drunk to call.

This is a great feature, there is nothing worse than having a friend replay your voice mails left at 3 AM after one too many. Or getting your phone bill after calling your ex in the middle of the night – when your ex moved to France two years ago!

This is also a great safeguard to keep you from calling your boss or mother while hammered.

The LP4100 has great potential to save lives. Most people will not buy a breathalyzer as a standalone product, but if it comes with a phone, why not?

The phone itself has all the features required by the younger set, and a sleek “sports-car” design. Remember, phones don’t let friends drink and drive!

__________________________________

Update #1 - Dec. 21, 2007 @ 5:34pm

I blocked said fuckwit, but I didn't delete him off my Windows Messenger list.

Woah is me.

Can you believe this fuckwit told me that to avoid such disturbances I should, let me quote this shit "turn ur fone off". To which my reply was "i shouldn't have to...have the common sense NOT to disturb someone". And his reply was "if ur fone is on, ur receiving calls and txts".

Now technically, yes, I am. That's like telling someone to turn off the ringer to their home phone before they go to bed. People have phones for a reason. Should an emergency happen, I want the call, so I keep my phone on. What I don't want is to be disturbed with stupid shit at 4am and most people I know get this. Funny that he doesn't.

I just think it's hilarious that the tried to argue this with me. It just shows that in spite of his education he has no manners and no damn sense. I ended the discussion by informing him it was a non-issue because I call blocked his number immediately after that.

I'm just amused and wanted to share this because I'd NEVER have the gall to take someone on about disturbing them at 4am. The levels of inconsiderate that I've found in the expatriates here is astounding.

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In a Bit of a Huff: John Mayer's Blog and MySpace

Okay, now I know that if a certain subsection of the folks who frequent John Mayer’s MySpace page get a whiff of this I might be virtually screwed if they lack a sense of humor as I'm hating big time in this one. I'm going to issue a caveat right here and now. This post is critical and mean. It's not critical and mean towards John Mayer, but his virtual groupies get quite a rant thrown at them. I just needed somewhere to vent and this is as good of a place as any.

This is the thing; I like the new direction this guy’s music has taken quite a bit. His first songs were excellent but decidedly reeking of groupie bait. Of course, a guy who sings a song called Your Body is a Wonderland is going to get a throng of sexually charged giggling girls trailing him around and swearing he’s the best thing since Richard Marx (see the VH1 link below for the reference). Now this is great for him being the currently single fellow that he is, but it’s hard trying to maintain a like for his music out of a fear of being categorized as a mindless Mayer groupie. So back in 2002, my music snob meter kicked in because I had no desire to have my friends point and laugh at me. Call it mainstream backlash as I probably would have not been so resistant had I heard him when he was building his career by playing in clubs.

However, when I heard Who Did You Think I Was on Yahoo! Music it was so damn good that, I swear, I literally stopped what I was doing and rushed to my computer to see who was singing this song. It reminded me of the blues inspired tunes that would sometimes pulsate through my home when I was growing up, and it was just a damn good song. To my surprise it was that guy I’d been avoiding showing me, and, a few others, that he could break it down with the best of them. He’d repackaged himself via the John Mayer Trio with Steve Jordan and Pino Palladino and that catapulted him to a new level of admiration. I actually ran out to the local record store and bought a copy of Try! the next day. This forced me to finally admit, okay maybe I did like Your Body is a Wonderland and Clarity…maybe.

In spite of the reports of a dreadful stand up comedy performance at NYC’s Comedy Cellar, John Mayer is damn funny and shows a wicked sense of humor in interviews and various other skits from Chappelle's Show to VH1’s John Mayer’s Has a TV Show pieces. So, in addition to being good at music he’s damn funny, self-effacing, makes fun of himself and his fans and seems to vibe on a similar vibe that me and my friends have. Let’s just say I was pleasantly surprised as I discovered I could groove to his music and laugh at his jokes. I'm from L.A. and have met a few celebrities. It's always nice when you get the feeling that the celebrity you admire for their work might also be a decent and engaging person.

This is just a long-winded way of saying I’m a recent John Mayer convert. However, I’m still grossed out on some level by the virtual groupie clamor around him. I’ve discovered that simply because I’m blogging like crazy means I’m exploring parts of the Internet I’ve been ignoring. While I'm surfing the net, I'm simultaneously listening to music which is leading me to all sorts of discoveries. This is how I developed an interest in MySpace and all of its weirdness. I’ve discovered the artist pages which I really like, most of the time. Now the John Mayer MySpace page is simply silliness, good, and stupidity, bad, at its finest. That judgment is not based on anything that John is posting because his stuff is usually very funny or non-eventful enough that you take it in, learn something and move on. It’s the virtual behavior of his fans on that site that makes you wonder if humanity doomed to destroy itself.

As I mentioned in my previous post "I Got a Woman" - Black Women and Negative Stereotypes, John Mayer has a new blog on his official website. Now, if you’re a silly and female, you don’t just read it and move on. You read it, flip the hell out and then commence to clog up the MySpace site with some of the dumbest comments ever which, for some reason, just irks me. I think part of it might be hoping that if John is looking at those comments he's laughing at them too because if he isn't, he's all ego. That would make him yet another celebrity I once liked but who has proven himself or herself to be a big asshole or worse a stone cold idiot.

What inspired this post was John’s Huff entry which he posted on July 13th. To be honest, so far I’m more interested in what Scotty Crowe, his road manager has to say than John. Come on, Scotty mentions the Zizou headbutt in his latest post and if you’ve been reading my blog you know I simply went nuts for this year’s World Cup tournament just as I went nuts being in a World Cup country in 2002. Yes, the US hosted it in 1994, but it was so boooooooooooooring. However, I digress. The point is any American male that shows the slightest interest in the World Cup is my friend and a potential drinking buddy. It's a great sport with hotter than hot men, so what's not to like? However, it could be more sinister than that as I’ve already established I had to be dragged kicking and screaming to the realm of John Mayer fandom. I’m probably still reeling from admitting that I like John Mayer at all. Therefore, it just might be the case that gravitating towards Scotty’s blog over John’s is yet another attempt to distance myself from the groupie stupidity that makes me want to become a bulimic it turns my stomach so.

Basically, the Huff post talks about how he watched the first six episodes of the show and he literally cried his brains out. That’s touching, really, as I love men who can show their emotions and really loathe dudes who don’t cry or otherwise show emotion (just ask the guy I’m not talking to now what my biggest complaint was, it was his coldness). However, after that got posted the Mayer minions on MySpace went ape shit. It was all I can do not to make snide comments about how stupid the comments were. Even though it's inane at times, I do respect the purpose of that page and there is no need to start shit there. However, this is my blog, my space and I can blast anything I want!


I'll share some of the post-Huff comments. Oh, that's another thing, John has intentionally kept comments off of the new blog on his website. I have to admit I'm so damn happy he did that because whenever I pop over to the MySpace one and read the comments I'm like this . Upon leaving, I feel that I need to give myself an extra shot of insulin or have shock therapy after I read the crap that's posted there. Believe me, I now know to avoid that MySpace page after he posts something on his blog or else I'll be doomed to wade through stupid comment after stupid comment.

Here are some selections taken straight from the MySpace site after John's Huff post complete with my bitchy annotations:

• No way to go about this sans being blatantly obvious, John. I have some news about HUFF that should hydrate the soul. Straight from the higher-ups of corporate america. As mentioned earlier, elsewhere... refrain from driving with tear-swollen eyes in LA. I did that in Valencia and hit a clown. Albeit an air machine clown, nonetheless a hazardous venture. Reciprocate a comment should you want the specifics. That is all, carry on.

WTF? Since L.A. is where I was born and raised, and where I learned how to drive I have no fucking idea what this fool is talking about or she thinks is so damn funny about running into an air machine clown with a car.

• I read the damn reviews for huff about the boy shooting himself in his office and got a little emotional. You're so smart Mr. Mayer, and always sooooo dead on. How is it that you do that? Hmmm? What's your secret.

Again, WTF? He just might be smart, but you, my dear, probably are not.

• Ummm.... the picture of the cast of HUFF looks similar to the picture of you and the boys getting ready for the tour.....
  lol....

"lol"? Not...try again.

• Dear John,
  After reading your lastest blog, HUFF, I would like to send you a care package.
  The package contain a box of tissues, an old philosphy book that I haven't read, April Fresh Downy (along with the Downy ball) and some Bounce dryer sheets.
  Why am I sending you the laundry materials? I fear you may not be using the proper products when laundering your many T-shirts.
  What can I say, I'm a giver!
  Just let me know where I should send the Fed-Ex driver and your stuff will be on the way!

A philosophy book you haven't read? ...um that's already very clear.

Fabric softner? Is this really supposed to be cute? (context needed: in the Huff post he mentions watching while surrounded by static ridden t-shirts)

Good Lord, strike me down now...better yet, strike her down.

• John,Your blog was so touching! You are such the REAL DEAL my friend! I've just ordered the Huff series from Amazon! Thank you!

"...the REAL DEAL" because he wrote a review of a cancelled TV show? Now if he's the real deal it's because he's active in social causes, donates his time, as well as money, to those in need, and has something to talk about beyond the entertainment industry. Again, he very well might be the real deal, but I wouldn't conclude that from this post.

However, he's definitely the real deal to the folks getting royalties from this show because all of you are rushing to order the DVD.

• Okay now you have my curiosity up, i will have to watch Huff and see what could make a man cry like a baby.

Clearly, this one doesn't get out much and doesn't have many male friends.

• Heard of HUFF, wanted to tune in, but don't have showtime.I'm glad I never had it, cuz i'm no good at seeing shows I love get cancelled. Now if they've stop production cuz it has reach its prime, now that's ok, though not so ok.
  I've had quite a few shows that I liked got cancelled. Won't name names though *coughLoveMonkeycough* What? I liked all 3 episodes hands down!!

Come again? Please spare us all or, better idea, learn how to write.

• ...I read the blog on John's page and how touching, he cries.
  I don't know if I should laugh or feel sorry for you John cause you cried. I kid, I kid ;) I saw "Huff" once or twice but always fell asleep everytime cause it was past my bedtime or I was always on myspace ;) Haha! Anyhoo, thanks for sharing yourself with us and I will rent that DVD just to see if I bawl like a baby like you did ;)

Poser...enough said.

Now it's time for me to get into why I like John Mayer and go and listen to the first single from his upcoming album Continuum Waiting on the World to Change. It's a nice groove, and you know it's taken me a fair amount of effort to say that.

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Miserable, Negative Punks R Us? Email Catfight

People never cease to amaze me. I started this blog a week ago not knowing if it would work for me or if people would give two cents about me, my life, or my opinions. Honestly, I'm still not sure which direction I want to go, but I'm having fun trying it and figuring something out. Primarily because I'd been spending a whole lot of my time posting on the forums at Nappturality.com, I noticed that I'd been writing a lot and that most of my posts were quite lengthy. I figured if I had that much to say then maybe it wouldn't be a bad idea to have my own place to say it. In fact, my first post on this blog was taken from the World Cup thread on that site. The thing is since that site has a distinct purpose which is encouraging black woman to love and learn how to work with the natural texture of their hair, a lot of what I had to say was just too off the radar. Plus, I don't really like having to explain myself over and over or engage in the thread wars, trolls, and other weirdness that happens on forums. Blogging means that only people who are truly interested will read it rather than people who are just going to reply because well, they're bored and they're waiting for their Lean Cuisine meal to heat up in the microwave. Forums are loads of fun at times, but I was getting tired of the forum dynamic as my primary way to communicate on the net.

Therefore, I went through the motions of finally setting up a blog. I'd been a member of Blogger.com for a couple of years, so it was the logical place to start. I'd even had a personal webpage site that was provided through my former ISP Earthlink. When I finally ended my Earthlink service my personal webpage was the feature that I missed the most. In fact, I saved the HTML code to those pages in the hopes that one day I'd start up something else again.

Anyway, that background information leads to the inspiration for this post. I figured it would be good to send out an email to people I knew, and, in reply, I received an amazing email exchange. I decided I'd send the link out to people I knew either as family, friends, classmates, coworkers or people whom I'd met while just wandering through life. I wrote a short message and then went through my 1,000 address plus email list making sure to only click the emails of only people I wanted to keep in touch with or who I wanted to be aware that I was blogging. This is the email I sent out word for word:

Happy 4th of July to friends and family celebrating in the States and elsewhere.

I'm sending this out to let you all know I've started a blog.

This is the link: http://expatjane.blogspot.com It's best to view it with Internet Explorer (and I never thought I'd ever promote IE).

Please take a moment to check it out. Like my Yahoo! 360 page, it's a way to keep in touch with friends, family, co-workers, classmates and other folks who I've met along the way.

I've also put the link in my signature, so, for future reference, you can always email me to get the link if you need it.

I hope you're all having a great summer!

Take care.

Tame, no? Anyway, most people replied positively which is good because I truly only try to attract positive people in my life. However, I got one email that shocked me with how rude it was. Here it is:

At the end of the day it is the height of impudence to assume that anyone is interested in one - I am sure no-one is interetsed in me - and for good reason.

Okay, cool buddy, I got it. You’re not interested, and are actually bothered that I alerted you about my blog. In addition, you also assume that no one gives a rat’s ass about you. Too bad, but okay. This is where I should have just deleted the email and gone on about my business. However, I’m a little hot under the collar at this point as I’m thinking “dude, just delete it if you don’t care. I’ll get the message when I don’t hear from you.” So first, I delete this contact from my email list, but then I foolishly reply and briefly say:

Well, that's nice (name deleted), but I thought it would be nice to let folks I know (and liked) about my blog.

If you're not interested in it, then just don't bother clicking on the link and it would have been nice of you not to reply.

Take care.

So this person not possibly not realizing I’m really pissed but trying to be civil answers with this steaming warm loaf of bullcrap:

Oh I don't mean you to take offence...Americans are so "out there" they sometimes don't appreciate the anomalies or subtlties in life. It is just bizarre that since a) we are not best friends and b) I haven't seen or heard from you since (event in common deleted), that you would suddenly think I was interested in your life. I suspect it is your "minimum effort" approach bearing fruit -just blog everyone in your list, no matter who they are and without any regard to your relationship (which you obviously do not pay regard to). Please pay me the courtesy of removing me from your email list.

At this point, I’m like “okay, you don’t want me to take offense but you write this shit to me?” I'm "out there", "I don't appreciate subtleties". Come on, Sunshine, this "insult the person while feigning civility" approach does not work with me. If you're going to dish it out, be ready because this American who doesn't recognize subtle is going to be damn civil yet exacting. This doesn't reflect a lack of subtlety. It shows that I didn't write you off as a full blown nutter when everyone else we worked with pretty much had.

So, foolishly, I reply again because now I most definitely annoyed with what he chose to say to me:

No, actually, I went through my list and checked people off one by one. I thought "I haven't heard from him and I liked him, so I'll include him".

No need to instruct me to take you off my list as I took you off my list as soon as I got your rude response. I meant no offense. I knew who you were and included you purposefully. I don't randomly spam people. I surely wouldn't do it for a personal blog.

As for the insult to Americans, I could fire back with some choice observations about (his nationality deleted because I really don't want to bash a nation based on a handful of people I've met) too. It's rather unnecessary to insult a whole country over the actions of one person.

I still wish you a great day wherever you are, but you definitely won't have to worry about trying to keep in touch with you any further.

Okay, slam dunk in terms of stupid, negative, idiot, email exchange and one less person to ever deal with again.

However, clearly something is motivating me to write about it. Sadly, it could be just because I have no life, but finishing this is making me late for a dinner and conversation with a new friend, so I have some sort of life. I’d like to think it’s at least partly public sociological-psychological-philosophical introspection or something like that.

The person who sent this is an older man who I met while working at a Christian English camp here in Korea. I had a great experience at the camp because when I heard "Christian English camp" I was thinking a bunch of evangelical holy rollers who were going to be more annoying than a pleasure to work with. But it was a short-term job and I really needed the extra cash infusion to move up to Seoul. What I didn't realize was I'd find a group a people I really, really liked, and who softened my perspective on modern Christianity. This is much so that I made a couple of friends I'll keep for awhile, found people to connect with and eventually started going back to church (much to the relief of family members and some friends).

At this camp, the subject of this post has a reputation for being rude, but I didn't mind it much because rarely did it come my way. Also, I did admire him because he confronted me when I did something particularly stupid. Now in that situation most people would have just talked behind my back. I really had come to like him because he showed he had some nerve. Plus, after living in L.A. and San Francisco, I've met some characters who are just great people with big shells built around them for protection. I get it. For him, I thought it was nerve associated with good sense and not just a tendency to spout off at anything that rubbed him the wrong way, like an email. Well, clearly I was wrong.

Like he said, I hadn't been in touch with him since the end of the camp last summer, but thought it would be nice to hear from him and let him know about my blog because of exactly that. I’ve had one hell of a year since last summer. I’ve been busy with this international studies master's thing, I got a new job, I had medical issues as I’m an insulin dependent (Type I) diabetic and have a thyroid going haywire, I had personal issues, etc. I’ve been trying to figure out where I go from here because I need to find a new path. The choice for me comes down to more travel and education abroad or return home to San Francisco, hang my “ready to settle down” sign out and then go on a quest for that modern family to call my own, or a combination of both as finding someone with my wanderlust and love for education and culture would be best. Who knows? But that's all to say, it's been a year for soul searching and figuring stuff out.

What amazes me are his assumptions and behavior as they're just so negative. I mean if you don't know, ask. If I were on the other side and I had the same suspicions, I would have just asked and not gone off the way he did. He presumed I had just indiscriminately emailed everyone in my address book. The funny thing is I did skip a few people I met at the camp simply because we didn't click, or I didn't particularly care for them. Also, I think he doesn't understand what a blog is. You don't "blog" people, and he used it in that sense in his email to me. My understanding is blogging is a way for people to talk about not only themselves but about what they think whether that's news, culture, entertainment, politics or whatever. I'm also amazed at him seeming offended that I hadn't been more attentive to him over the last year. Had he asked I would have said pretty much what I said above: stuff has been happening with me and I’m so busy that if my mother were still alive she’d be begging for a phone call from me, it’s that crazy. However, now I'm on vacation for a few weeks, and I’m finding a way to channel my energy and thoughts. Simple, no?

Anyway, it's neither here nor there. It’s just sadly funny. What's weird is Korea attracts a lot of foreigners that behave like this. This isn't the first time I've had some random weirdness thrown at me, but as this is the latest "weird ass foreigner" story, I guess that's why it stands out and it worth writing about.

I just see it as a random event that really shows that a person’s perspective on life makes a huge difference in how they see things and how they chose to deal with people. If you assume that folks are just using you and could care less about you, then you're shocked and hostile when people try to engage you. Of course, that puts them off and it's a self-fulfilling prophecy. I’m positive and, pretty much, happy even when the world is raining down trauma on me (there have been exceptions, hence why last year was just sheer madness). I’ve been known to smile and joke when telling sad stories. It’s just how I get through. Life is hard and either you get up and dust yourself off or you stay down and get crushed. I've noticed that those who look at what can be and who are thankful do the best in this game called life. Others however, have a different style. It’s just interesting when those styles clash.

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